June 26, 2009

Ant Man

"The city is under martial law until we eradicate them!"

Wednesday started off like any other day until we received the memo from the Virginia Department of Agriculture and Consumer Services (VDACS). It seems that nearly all of the cities and counties that make up the Hampton Roads region have been put under a fire ant quarantine. According to the memo, the number of fire ant mounds treated (free of charge) by VDACS has increased from a yearly average of 33 , to 642 in the last six months of 2008. A shocking figure, but are the ants on the march, or is there greater public awareness, maybe some of each. The quarantine restricts the movement of such items as nursery stock, sod, soil, mulch and even mud-caked construction equipment. You are not allowed to send any of these items out of the quarantine area unless it has been certified to be free from fire ants. In my opinion all of this was unfortunately dumped onto affected businesses without many details on how one gets certified. It had me wondering if we were going to have to ask for ID's to make sure we did not sell plants to people outside the quarantine, or would there be roadblocks at the county line to check for contraband begonias and azaleas. I put a call in to the local VDACS office to get clarification, the poor lady who answered the phone said she had been inundated with calls, but no one had provided her with information, and she would have someone else call me.

Not long after I finished reading the memo, the phone rang and WTKR TV was on the phone wanting to know if they could come out to get my thoughts. I did not want to sound like an idiot, especially on TV, so I got a quick on-line education on the critters to add to what I already knew. There was no interview, I just had to stand there and spout ant facts for the evening news. After the cameraman left, the phone rang again. This time it was the Daily Press asking me to answer ant questions and wanting to know what affect this would have on our business. I spoke at length with the reporter, and she must have liked what she heard, because she decided to come out to the store with a photographer. Later that day a gentleman from VDACS returned my call, and apparently retail garden centers that do not grow or ship product will likely not be affected. Even so I asked if they would come out and give us an fire-ant-free clean bill of health. We also decided to get more fire ant bait onto the shelves, as VDACS will no longer treat fire ant mounds in the quarantine area. As expected this story was airing on all of the TV stations that evening, thankfully it was not as sensationalized as I had expected.

On Thursday it was an "above-the-fold" story in the Virginian Pilot, complete with little ants surrounding the headline. Later that morning The Smithfield Times (The Pulse of the Counties) called me for yet more questions. Of course now all of this ant news and any other news story has been pushed well aside for Michael Jackson news (I am sure a certain governor in South Carolina is not in mourning tonight). Even though I was never a big Michael Jackson fan, I am sorry he is gone, but now I have that Alien Ant Farm cover of Smooth Criminal stuck in the folds of my convoluted brain.

I guess I am becoming Ant-Man.

12 comments:

  1. Ok Mr. Celebrity -- here is a short story for you. I always think of this one when I hear about fire ants. (which we encountered in Texas and I have the scars to prove it) http://www.classicshorts.com/stories/lvta.html 'Leiningen versus the Ants'

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  2. Janet,
    I read the whole thing, and it was the first short story I ever read over the internet. I think I saw a movie based on it, and it may have had Joan Collins in it. Thank you!

    Les

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  3. A quarantine is a good thing. I always worry if someone wishes to give me plants or something from fire ant areas. We don't have any here so I am most cautious. Here in Tennessee there was a law enacted I think last year or the year before that all agriculture plants (we usually get ours shipped in from Georgia or somewhere south) are treated. Not sure how they check it but the shipments do require stickers. Can't see how all bugs can be killed but then I guess nurseries have their way. When the fire ants move here, I'm moving north:)

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  4. Les, I'm still confused about what all this means in terms of your selling plants to people - DO you have to ask for ID, etc? And another question - I'm planning to take some plants to donate to the sales area at Green Spring next week, as well as the National Gesneriad Society show and sale in Silver Spring, MD. Is this now illegal, even for a hobby grower like myself? If so, you may soon find yourself with a homeless flat of Titanotrichum oldhammii and several small, innocent looking Tetrapanax on your doorstep (and you can have some, anyway, if you want...)!

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  5. Hi Les, glad you read it! Isn't it suspenseful?? This was read to me in gradeschool, fifth grade I think. Interesting classroom reading!!

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  6. Tina,
    We get nursery stock from all over the country. They all come with certificates from the sending states Ag. dept. saying the nursery has been inspected, but that does not mean each pot has been looked at, only the nursery as a whole.

    Jeff,
    As far as the Ag. man told me, retail garden centers can sell to anyone no matter where they live. Individuals such as yourself can take plants out of the area. Wholesale growers must be certified fire-ant free. As far as Tetrapnax goes, it only looks innocent.

    Janet,
    It was interesting and the victor of the story was a surprise to me. I guess I am a product of the post Vietnam/Watergate world where happy endings are not necessarily expected.

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  7. Wow Les, all that free advertising! Woo Hoo! I do not like those destructive varmints. So glad you are keeping them in Virginia Beach. If any escape and make it our way, I'm calling the local tv station and telling that you have the whole scoop on the story.

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  8. Anna,
    I think this issue will be more of a coastal one. All of the counties south of here in NC have been under quarnatine for some time. Apparently the magic temperature for fire ants is 10 degrees Farenheit. Anthing below that and they are less likely to survive the winter.

    Les

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  9. Les: re "Apparently the magic temperature for fire ants is 10 degrees Farenheit. Anthing below that and they are less likely to survive the winter."

    The crucial missing word here is "outside" . . . RIFA will and do happily invade ans nest in switch housings, traffic light controllers, transformers, aircon boxes, gardens, homes, stables, kennels, hospitals, retirement homes etc (and anywhere else there is food, moisture or warmth) when those essentials get hard to find elsewhere.

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  10. Mac-Man,
    Thanks for the clarification, they are indeed sneaky little bastards.

    Les

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  11. Okay, I was going to post a comment about ANT-MAN (do you have a cape? you must have a cape!) but then I got distracted by Loretta's duet with herself and I have to say that is just hilarious. It beats out ANT-MAN - and now I think that Loretta deserves a cape. Isn't that a video that could go on one of those dog video shows? It's a classic.

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  12. Pam,
    Speaking of capes, I read somewhere on line a list of some actual warning labels that were put on various products. On a child's superhero costume was "Warning: Cape will not enable you to fly!". How disappointing! In light of that, Loretta would probably prefer a Milkbone instead of a cape.

    Les

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